truth is like shit…
Friday, June 8, 2007truth is like shit. even if you hide it, it'll stink. someone will eventually discover it. it gets uglier over time when people don't find it to clean it up. it sucks, it stinks and best of all when it's bad, no one wants to go near it.
in two days, it would be joe and i's 1 year meeting. and how timely for shit to come out. the truth stinks, i just didn't know that it was this kind of shit.
marie asks, "should i even tell you, i got to fish yesterday and i found out something about joe. do you want me to tell you about it"…being the girl who was supposedly over and hopefully unaffected, i answered, "no prob".
marie, still a club fiend, still drinking, still hanging out where we used to, still talking to the same people, still bumping into joe and his relatives. "i'm sorry to tell you this but joe and his wife got back together even before he left the country."
boom. i saw stars. i thought a train hit me, but i felt unusually empty after.
she continued on to say how joe finally got what he wanted. he now specializes on what he wants to specialize on, he has gotten back together with his wife…even while i was still in the picture.
he lied. and to think i got him that armani top for his advanced birthday gift.
no wonder he let me go so easily.
and acted like shit while doing it.
the worst part is that joe told me the exact opposite while he was stil here. he said he was having problems with his "ex" because she wanted to keep the kids…apparently, he didn't like the way they lived over there…but anyway, she still got them. he even had the balls to lie to me on the day that he left, he never even gave me a chance to call him up when he was boarding. and the sickest part was, i got him this brochure for a car he wanted to buy…YUP it was a present to the lady. wow. how ironic is that.
i am officially indecent. i was in a relationship with a man who was together with his wife! even if i din't know about it then, it really really gives me chills when i look back. to top it all off, he lied. and i had always told him that if the time comes that they get back together or IF…i'm gone. but he never gave me that. he never had the balls to tell me.
what a coward.
i'm glad though, after all this bullshit for half a year, his kids will grow up with both parents under one roof…that's my only consolation. those kids are both wonderful, and they deserve only the best.
maybe someday i'll make sense of all this. but right now, i just feel blank.
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